1.17.2007

goodbye

I went to say goodbye tonight. Goodbye to my Great Grandma Mildred Van Liew. She's pretty much on her deathbed at this point. She coughed a few times, and each time my heart sank. She kept saying, "Sorry," in a very muffled, hard-to-understand voice which was barely audible. She was apologizing that she couldn't express herself to me. I said, "Oh, don't apologize, you beautiful lady. I love you." I had talked with my dad earlier, and I was debating whether or not to go. What made up my mind was that my dad asked me to communicate to her that they were praying for her and loved her. I did communicate that to her, and she replied, if through hardship, "With all my heart, I love [them]." I sang to her tonight. I did three or four hymns that I found in a hymnal there at Paul and Naomi Van Liew's house. How Great Thou Art, My Jesus I Love Thee, and Great is Thy Faithfulness. Each one, if you look at the words in each stanza, references death and seeing the Lord. It was quite fitting. She would close her eyes more when I sang. I pray she enjoyed it and it brought her joy. I brought Amy and Aidan with me. Aidan brought a smile to grandma Van's face with his laughing and funny noises. It was great to see her face brighten with a smile and even her laughter. Her motor skills were so gone that when she grabbed on to Aidan's hand, she couldn't let go. I had to remove her fingers to get Aidan free. That also tore at my heart. I told her how much I appreciated her service to the Lord and that I loved her. I was there for about an hour before I left. I said goodbye.

1 comments:

The Vaughn Van Liews said...

I know it's selfish, but I want her to hang on until I can say good-bye, too. Mom